What's with All the Corporate Shenanigans?

I work for a company that distributes products worldwide across three different industries. Consequently, we have three different divisions.

Recently, one of our divisions released some new training materials. I saw the pdf proofs of these, and I passed them on to a couple of managers that oversee training in our division (one internally, one externally). They asked me to get actual copies of the material when it was available. Simple, right?

Heh.

I start, logically enough, with an e-mail: "Hey, Training Guru for Other Division, can we get a couple of copies up here?"

A week goes by. Nothing.

I follow up with a phone call: "Hi, Training Guru. Where are we on this?"

TG: "Who is your manager?"

Me: (WTF?) "Well, my manager is so-and-so, and she happens to be in your office right now if you have to talk to her. Since she's not the one requesting the information, I'm not sure what difference it makes. It's actually for another manager."

Another week passes.

I e-mail again: "Hey, TG, my manager said she never spoke to you, what's going on?"

TG: "I'll take it up with the other manager directly."

Well excuse the fuck out of me. I didn't realize I needed a membership badge and a secret fucking handshake to get these things from you. It's not a pile of gold, you idiot; it's a corporate document, and it should be freely available to any employee that asks for one. I'm not selling them on E-Bay, you know. Just because you can't conceive of any possible reason we would want them doesn't mean that they are useless to us. And while you're bending your mind to come up with reasons to deny my request, how about you take a look at the top of your paycheck. What does it say, there? What a coincidence! It says the same fucking thing at the top of mine! We work for the same company! Rest assured that if you ever requested anything of my creation, you'd have it in your Inbox so fast you'd think I travel through time.

Remember that line in your employee agreement about anything you create becoming the property of the company? Yeah. They actually mean that. That implies that you don't have the power to deny me copies of these things because you're too stupid to figure out that it's only a small matter of editing to make them applicable across divisions. I don't care how long it took you to compile it. I have personally spent over 200 hours updating our division's technical manual, which I gave away to everyone, regardless of whether or not they requested it. I wanted everyone to see the work I'd put into it. Now, maybe you're shy, or you half-assed it and don't want anyone to find out, but we honestly don't care. We want that formatting, and we will get it.

I know your division has this enormous ego, despite how many times we show you up, but this isn't a pissing contest. I shouldn't have to file a fucking FOIA request to get these things. Suck it up, and take them to Shipping. They'll handle the hard part for you. You can then take as much time as you want complaining to the other sycophantic assholes there.

In the meantime, we'll be quietly surging ahead.