My Self-Serving Law

I think our governor, being a good little Democrat, would want to deliver on her party’s promises to improve the economy. With that in mind, I humbly suggest the following legislation:

Any business advertising an open position MUST FILL THAT POSITION, or be fined the equivalent of a year’s salary for that position.

I’m getting heartily sick of sending in résumés, only to be told during the follow-up call “Oh, we decided to hold off on hiring anyone right now; we’re just collecting applications.” What a fucking waste of time and energy. I can understand if someone else got the job; it’s an employer’s market right now. But to jerk everybody around? I hope your industry is the next domino to fall.

I’m also getting irritated by the lack of return calls. That’s not just basic business protocol, that’s good etiquette in general.

A buddy of mine got called in for two interviews at one company, and when the phone call came in, he was told they’d eliminated the slot entirely. What the fuck? You obviously have a need for someone, or you wouldn’t have started the whole process. And then you change your mind? Not only are you not going to hire anyone, you’re eliminating that space on the Org chart completely?

I’m fervently hoping that this recession will trim out a lot of the dead (read that: complacent) wood that’s been cluttering up our economic infrastructure. Maybe we’ll see a return to something resembling good customer service.

And maybe there’ll be a unicorn in my garage tomorrow morning, too.